D&D Armory: Obsidian Macuahuitl of Plant Slaying

It was the dawn of a new age. Aztec ruler Acamapichtli was secretly looking to put a friendlier face on the Aztec empire, after many years of sub-optimal PR surrounding human sacrifice.
An invite was sent across the land for ideas around Acamapichtli's new rally cry: "Come and see the cozy side of Coixtlahuaca"

Aspiring Aztec chef, Yolotli Nahuatl set out to make a new name for the Aztec people, cultivating a hipper foodie focused vibe. Unfortunately historians consider Yoloti's culinary development a tragedy of circumstances. On the verge of breakthrough, Yoloti was attempting to remove his pièce de résistance, a Mexican Pizza, (edging Taco Bell to market by a mere 900+ years), when a gang of unruly Spanish invaders kicked his door down and fandangoed there way into the kitchen. Yoloti withdrew his "pizza paddle", and lit up those Spaniards with a beatdown that would go down through the ages. Though his epic face paddling couldn't save the Empire from conquest, the story became a rallying point for Aztec warriors. Adoring fans started fashion weapons akin to Yoloti's famous paddle, and the brutal Macuahuitl was born.

But at what cost? Yoloti's vision of the Aztec Empire as a Charming Delectable Destination, was quickly and violently shattered. His "Mexican Pizza"...lay burnt to a crisp in the oven. Archeologist recently discovered Yoloti's plans for The Dodecadilla (again, beating Taco Bell not only to market, but also in polygons used in a recipe). Could his culinary genius have saved the Aztecs? A question sadly lost to history.