Hello. Today is a little different. Today, I will be celebrating the magical girl genre. I guess for the entire month, I should say, because this month is MAGICAL GIRL MAY!!! I think you get the point. If not, Magical Girl May is a tradition that happens every month of May. For the entire month, you must do something magical girl-related to celebrate the magical girl genre, whether it be drawing, watching, reading, or just pretending to be magical girls! For this year, I’ve decided to BE a magical girl.

From what I know, the main quest of many magical girls is to save the world. I also like singing. And rainbows. And a fun story that I can relate to. And having a rival to push me forward. And to say the word “Crap”.

So I thought to myself, What is a good game that involves saving the world, singing, rainbows, a fun story I can relate to, a rival to push me forward, and the word ‘Crap’ where I can become a magical girl?

Then it hit me.

The perfect game…

“Wandersong is a musical platforming adventure with an emotional story. Play as a silly bard and use music to interact with everything on a journey around the world! You essentially play as a walking musical instrument, and different things respond to your music in different ways. Along the way you'll explore, solve puzzles, and meet a huge cast of characters!” ( Wanderso.ng )

And so, with my magical powers intact, I headed into the musical, magical, “Crap”-containing game that is Wandersong. And let me just say…

I did not deny this magical adventure one bit.

It started off with me walking through a world with a beautiful starry sky, the perfect place for a magical girl to transform for the first time. Upon arrival, I saw a sword floating in midair. I immediately decided to grab it, knowing that it was the perfect weapon for a magical girl to use on her quest to save the world. Suddenly, a large beast appeared in front of me. This was it. My first foe. It was time to show the world my true power-

There I was. Standing face to face with the beast in front of me. With no other option, I decided to sing. I sang loud and proud, like it was the end of the world. And, with my singing, the strange creature dissipated, in its place, a much cuter white being with rainbow-colored hair, who called me cute.

She apologizes for scaring me, and explains that this was a test to see if I was a hero. To which I reply, “Just a bard looking to become a magical girl! You’ve got the right person, m’lady.”

The creature then introduces itself as “Messenger of the goddess Eya”, to which I reply, “Y’know, that doesn’t really explain who you are all that much.”

After a quick search on the internet, I discovered that this “Messenger’s” name is Eyala. (Spoiler Warning: her name doesn’t get revealed until WAY later in the story, but you’ll have to stick around to find out when! wink)

Eyala then explains that Eya is a goddess, who used her song of creation to set our universe into motion. And pretty soon, she will sing it again, which will replace our universe with a new one. It’s a tradition that Eya likes to do, and it’s pretty sad. Besides, Eyala really likes me. She could be the PERFECT mascot!

That’s when the REAL story begins.

Update: Sorry for not uploading anything yesterday. I was…

Busy.

ANYWAY…

I woke up in my bed with a start, realizing the experience I just had was all a dream. I got ready for the day by transforming, and set out to start the day with a walk! On the way, I met this weird guy with a mask, who told me that there are ghosts in the nearby town. I decided to go check it out, thinking it was the perfect first quest for a magical girl! Just then, I stumbled into this girl with blue hair. I apologized, and the blue-haired girl forgave me. She introduced herself as Miriam, and let me through to Langtree.

Once I entered, I saw a man near a house, and I decided to go ask him what was wrong. He told me that the mayor was in that house, and she hasn’t come out since. I decided to go in, the brave magical girl I was.

Inside, I saw the mayor waving a broom at a ghost that sang creepy hymns. I decided to sing them back, and it caused the ghost to shrink and disappear.

After doing that two more times, the mayor thanked me. She then told me about this overseer, who may have information about the world ending. I then learned that I needed to sing the overseer’s song to get to him. I felt as if the old lady I helped earlier might know it, and lo and behold she did! I learned the overseer song!

Afterwards, I went to the shrine, sang the song, and presto, I was in the spirit world! There, I saw Eyala, and greeted her with happiness, knowing that she was real all along. But that meant… the world really WAS ending. I told her how I could stop it, and Eyala responded with info about the “Earthsong”. She said it was not easy, that it requires the living will of all beings on my planet. Eyala then told me about the overseer, and requested I go to his castle to seek assistance.

“Like a quest!” I responded. “A magical quest!” That only made Eyala more happy to see me. After she left, I set off on my quest to meet the dream king (That’s what he’s called)!

A few puzzles later, I made it to the Dream King’s castle, and walked inside. There, I saw a white kitten with monarch butterfly wings floating above a throne. I asked the kitten if it was the overseer, to which it replied with a subtle “no”, that it was the Dream King’s fairy. It then told me that the dream king was “Preoccupied”, and that I had to wait to see him. But I didn’t want to wait, and I decided to go see him NOW, despite the fact that the Dream King “HATES waking up”.

To stop me, the fairy repeatedly bashed my head with its entire body. It didn’t hurt, but it was quite annoying. After a bit of climbing, the fairy stopped hitting me, and let me ring the bell to wake up the Dream King.

After a bit of ringing, the Dream King taught me his language, and we had a bit of a talk.

“Your majesty,” I explained. “I have ventured into the spirit world, and come so far to see you. Not even puzzles, or a strange yet cute-looking kitty butterfly, could stop me. And now, I am here, and I wish to ask you for your assistance in saving this world that is slowly ending.”

The Dream King then revealed himself to be…

Just another cat, but bigger. Ooookayyyy.

I asked him if he could teach me the Earthsong, to which he replies with a disappointing “no”. He then reminded me that “The Earthsong channels the voice of all life on this planet”, which I already know. “And if that life isn’t in perfect harmony, the song won’t work”.

The Dream King then sent me back to my arrival point, but not before I could get a “There’s ghosts haunting Langtree!” out of me.

I wanted to give up, but Eyala (Who was there by the way) encouraged me, by telling me that there were six other overseers, each with a piece of the Earthsong, and if I go to each of them, maybe I could save the world. “One thing at a time, y’know?” She points out. But first, I had to deal with the ghosts back home.

After exiting the spirit world, I went to Langtree, where I stopped the ghosts from attacking. I then realized that I could translate the ghost language, thanks to the Dream King. And so, the ghosts wanted me to deliver a little message…

Good People of Langtree

Oh why can't you see

Though we appear ghostly

We're not enemies

We're Ron, John, and Mary

Your folks who've just passed

But this world is ending

And so we've amassed

You won't get your fair chance

To live your lives through

And that's why we've come back

To spend time with you 

The people of Langtree stopped being scared of, and instead, were nice to the ghosts for once. The mayor then made me the new mayor, to which the citizens declined, because I was kind of a dope. So I guess I’m not the mayor. Fine by me.

After I left, I saw Miriam again, but she was on a floating broom.

“I didn’t know you were a magical girl too!” I couldn’t help but say. Miriam then told me that she heard me talking in the spirit language, and she soon learned that I talked to an Overseer. She then told me to ride on her broom. I hopped on, and we were off!

Update: Okay, we got a LOT of catching up to do. First off, I need to talk about chapter 2 before I can move on to anything else.

We stopped at Miriam’s house, where I met her grandma Sapphy. She knows I talked to an overseer, and explains that they’ve “been trying to commune with them since we divined this world’s fate”. But Sapphy can see the Dream King didn’t help me.

I guess Sapphy likes me, “So full of hope! Unlike my granddaughter”. She suggested we travel together, but Miriam states that she doesn’t know my name. I had to choose Kiwi, because Mary wasn’t even an option in this game. And also because Kiwi is the bard’s canon name, apparently.

Update: Ok, so before we continue, I didn’t get to ALL of chapter 2 yesterday due to lunch and all, but I’m pretty sure a LOT more will be done, trust me.

We exited Miriam’s house for a little walk. Miriam told me that there were monsters in the nearby cave, which I TOTALLY wasn’t scared about!

As we walked through the cave, Miriam pointed out that she was a witch, “With super awesome magical powers”, and she “can handle monsters”, but we’re just going to pretend that she’s also a magical girl.

When we got to a crystal bridge, a monster showed up and blew us away, and (As much as I would’ve absolutely LOVED to see Miriam “dish out some magic”) I tried to talk to it.

It (or she) explains that her boyfriend was cursed by a magical spell, so we decided to help her with singing (Even though this would’ve been a great opportunity for a magical fight).

The monster lets us through, and we see that her boyfriend is frozen by lightning (I dunno how that’s possible, but ok). None of us knew how to cure him, so I decided to leave that to the side for now and leave the cave.

Miriam then leads me to “a town called Delphi”, where there’s a BUNCH of stuff to do. The first thing I did was create a new candy shop theme, unlocking a new dance. I then sang to a strange man, who wanted to create a band. He told me to get new members, which I did.

The first is Viola, a violin girl who, after singing with, joined the band (kinda). Afterwards, another band member was in the hotel for her mom’s funeral, and wouldn’t join the band.

Curious, I decided to go to the graveyard, and met that accordion girl’s mom, who, after singing with AGAIN, followed me to the hotel.

After a bit of ghost translating, Ash (That’s the accordion girl’s name, btw) joined the now complete band, hooray!

Once we performed for literally EVERYONE at Delphi (“You think they got anything better to do tonight??”), Ash came out and literally PERFORMED the overseer’s song, which I VERY needed.

After waking up from the concert, I went and told Miriam that I learned the Overseer’s song, which she was VERY cool about.

Miriam told me to “go find the Breathing Crystals and sing that song”, which I did.

The puzzles last time were flowers and birds, in THIS Overseer’s spirit world, it’s singing to make winds move other directions. THAT was easy.

ANYWAY, once I FINALLY made it to the Queen of Winds’s castle, I met a bird who didn’t want me to see the Queen of Winds, so I literally BLASTED him in the air with my singing. That was easy.

Once I got the Queen of Winds’s piece, I immediately exited the spirit world and sang a special song to the monster’s boyfriend from earlier...

My whole life no one's noticed

Or expected much from me

They think a silly singer

Is all I'm meant to be

But now the world is ending

And I'm not gonna hide

I'm just a bard but I'll work hard

To show them what's inside

I wanna be a hero

Control my life's events

I'll use my song to prove them wrong

And make a difference

(Apology note: I WANTED to draw for this one, but the drawings got… deleted.)

The song ended up healing the monster’s boyfriend, and I left the cave with a smile on my face.

Afterwards, I met up with Miriam, who called a pirate to help her, and I was given the choice-

I decided to go with Miriam. I truly WANTED to be the hero, no matter what. And I will pick the decision that best suits a TRUE hero.

And so, we set sail, to find the next piece of the Earthsong.

Update: Okay, we’re past the first week, so I’ve got to speed this up.

On the pirate ship, I talked with the captain, who wanted a cup of coffee. “Wheee.” Once I got him the coffee, all the pirates started to sing, and I sang along…

Oh…

Ohhhh…

Ohhhh!

Ohhhh!!

OOOHHHHHH!!!

“Ohhhh no…”

We're the Coffee Pirates, and we sail the seas

Searching for delicious coffee beans

We may act tough, but we ain't no fiends

Unless you try to take our sweet caffeine

Call me Lucas, I'm the captain of this crew

I'm Nina and I'm tougher than you

Name's Lou, I'm just here to cook the food

I'm Francisco, and this song is dumb

A few hours after the song, I was given a coffee, which I drank. And from what I’ve learned, do NOT give children coffee…

I woke up, realizing what I did, and walked out of the ship to find Miriam standing in front of it. She called me “Sunshine”, which is VERY lesbian, but cute still.

But, back to the MAIN topic, I learned that the nexus point is not here, but on “some uninhabited island”, and that “We still have to find the… Guess”.

After doing my “people… thing”, I found a fortune teller’s house, and went into it. There, I found the fortune teller was packing to “go chill on a beach till it all goes down”.

I told her about the Overseer’s song, to which she tells me about a “Mermaid’s Tear”, which is needed to go to the Mermaids’ island. She also told me that the mermaids knew the Overseer’s song, but they’re all gone. Just a bunch of lore stuff.

I went and told the captain, he told me about more lore, and we set off again!

I first went to the Mermaid Ruins, where the tear was supposed to be. Buuut it’s just more puzzles. AND there was only a PIECE of the tear! UUUUUGH. ANYWAY, after a minigame (and learning another dance because), I went to the most CONFUSING island in the WHOLE game, the Turtle Shores. There, I had to deal with TWO puzzles. The first was easy, purple cyan orange, but the second was… confusing. I tried SO many combinations, and none worked. I tried Zebra Gamer’s walkthrough, but he doesn’t even SHOW the answers. So, I tried an ACTUAL walkthrough, and learned it was blue rock, glitchy yellow bird, and red flower. I’m such a dumbass.

ANYWAY, I got the next piece of the tear, and went back to the fortune teller’s house, where she marked a location on my map, signaling the mermaids were there. And that’s it. Nothing else happened.

But before I could go to the mermaid island, I had to deal with a bully that I PROBABLY didn’t mention. I tried talking to him, to no avail, and then I realized.

I went to get a cup of coffee, and with my hyper-charged magical girl powers, I absolutely YEETED the bully off the ship. Crisis averted!

I went to the mermaid island, and met the mermaids, who REJECTED the captain, and taught me the Overseer’s song.

At the nexus point, I cheered up the captain by hugging him, and sang the Overseer’s song.

After SO many glob-related puzzles, I made it to the Overseer, who was brutally MURDERED by a warrior named Audrey Redheart. I was kinda mad at her, and a bunch of stuff happened;

Eyala got involved, I learned that Audrey was on a quest to kill all the overseers, then I got brutally injured (Jerk), Miriam was also there, and bada bing, bada boom, the next piece of the Earthsong was mine.

Hoooooo boy, WHAT A CHAPTER! At least I can play the game again! I’ll be quick with it too. VERY quick.

Edit: I meant Earthsong. I'm such a dumbass. WHY did I put OVERSEER'S song??? IDK.

Note: Just a heads-up that this next part will be written in Audrey’s POV. Just this part, and then we’ll get back to the bard (me)! Also, this will be a narrative because why not. Okay, here you go!

I walk through the halls of the castle, thinking about that dumb bard and the end of the world stuff. Stupid bard, thinking she’s a magical girl, when she’s CLEARLY not. I mean, who said SHE was a hero??? I think back to our first meeting…

“I’m a magical girl, on a quest to meet the overseers…” The bard explains. “To learn the Earthsong! Eya already picked me!”

Who said SHE was the chosen one? The only thing SHE seems to do is sing and be annoying. While singing.

“No…” says a familiar voice. “You definitely don’t understand, lil bard…” Eyala appears before us, with hair as colorful as ever. I guess this “Magical Girl” person only knows who this messenger is. Maybe I should tell her Eyala’s name… but not while we’re in an overseer’s castle… Maybe another time.

“WHhhhhhhhhhhhhh…” The bard says in shock, trying to process the whole “This jerk killed the overseer, is friends with the rainbow girl, and I’m not a hero after all” situation. And it doesn’t look like she’s working it out. “WHAT is going on??”

“Um, well…” Eyala tries to explain to CLEARLY both of us. “Basically… The Earthsong isn’t gonna work.”

“It won’t??” The bard replies in a confused tone.

“No. In every cycle of the universe, every single time, it’s never worked. The world is too filled with discord, especially when it gets this old.”

“And that’s where I come in!” I barge into the conversation between Eyala and the dumb bard. “To destroy each overseer, and free the world of their corruption!”

“And that is gonna save the world…?” The dumb bard wonders. I think I’ll start calling her that. Dumb Bard. Because she’s CLEARLY not a magical girl, that’s for sure.

“No.” Eyala explains. “The overseers hold your whole world together. But when they get old and messed up like this, there’s no way to fix them. The moment the last one dies, that’s how the world ends, so the next cycle can start.”

The dumb bard and I are CLEARLY in shock. Well, she is physically, but I am mentally. How come Eyala has never told me this before? Couldn’t she have saved that until I killed the last overseer or something?

“Sorryyyyyyy…” Eyala apologizes to the dumb bard. “I know it sounds sad, but that’s the way it’s supposed to be. I didn’t really think you’d make it this far…”

“So I was supposed to give up? And just let the world end?” The dumb bard asks. “Why’d you even tell me about the Earthsong in the first place?”

“Because I really like you!” Eyala replies, not knowing that I’m clearly PISSED at both of them. The dumb bard for getting in my way, and Eyala for telling me all this now instead of saving it for later. “And… I didn’t want to tell you no… I still don’t!! But I have to be realistic. I’m an angel of Eya and the guide to the hero. My job is to usher in the end, and pave the way for a new beginning.”

“SHEESH, quit being such a dumbass baby!” I interrupt the current conversation. “This is just the way it works! You really thought you could sing some shitty song and solve everything? How about you leave it to the REAL heroes?”

The dumb bard turns to me, pissed because I killed the overseer and we’re “saving the world”.

“How about YOU…” The dumb bard replies as I point my sword to the sky. “Leave the… shutting up…!” Lightning pours into the sword as I prepare to slice.

“To… YOU!!!” The dumb bard runs to me, and I swing my sword at the right time, severely injuring her with a lightning-charged boost.

Why…? WHY did Eyala tell me all that? And WHY was the dumb bard even THERE to witness it? Whatever. I just gotta focus on killing the Queen of Winds. Not like it even matters, anyway.

Ahead of me, I suddenly spot three black bat-looking creatures. Their bodies are shaped like basketball-sized eggs, but black. They each had one big eye, with a black pupil. Their purple bat wings were outlined in black, and they had three sharp teeth, ready to tear me apart. I ready my sword to attack. The bats fly towards me, and I slice one of them. It turns into black dust that flies away as soon as I kill it. Another bat sinks its teeth into my shoulder, so I grab it by the eye, throw it to the ground, and pierce its eye, finishing it off. I turn to see the last bat behind me, and charge my sword. The bat charges after me as I blast it with lightning, killing it.

As I continue to walk through the castle, I spot another monster floating above me. It has slate blue hair, to (sorta) match with its cylinder-shaped lighter slate blue body, and its short horns of the same color. It also has the bats’ purple wings, but without the black outline. On the bottom of its body are many more teeth, ready to consume me. As it lowers to the ground, I dodge just in time, and stab its head, allowing me to continue.

As I continue, Eyala appears next to me.

“Pssst! Hey Audrey!” Eyala reminds me. “Don’t forget, you can point your sword straight up to charge it with lightning.”

“Augh! Shut up!” I silence the messenger next to me. “I would have figured that out myself!”

“Oh.” Eyala responds. “Ok.” She disappears as I notice the endless pit below me. I look up and see a bridge on the other side, and behind it is a dim lightbulb. I know what I have to do. I charge my sword and point it at the lightbulb. It lights up as the bridge extends towards me. I step on the bridge and continue my walk towards the Overseer.

Eventually, I come to five large tubes, symbolizing that I’m close. A crow wearing a yellow scarf floats towards me, with a bored look on its face.

“Oh, great. Another human. You here to be all loud and annoying like the last one? That sure was a riot. Fat lotta good she did.” The crow is clearly not amused. This bird is probably the overseer’s fairy, since the Queen of Winds is also a bird. “The Queen of Winds is doing just awful, if you were wondering. Acting all dark and spooky. She keeps birthing monsters.” Like the monsters I fought during my trek.

“Well, that-” I WAS going to reply…

“It’s so gross.” But the fairy interrupts me. Jerk. “She’s getting worse every day. This place just isn’t the same anymore.”

“Aaaaargh, shut up!!!” I interrupt the fairy back. “I’m here to take care of the Queen of Winds.” I point my sword towards the fairy. “Tell me where she’s hiding.”

“Like, take care of…?” The fairy realizes. “Oh jeez. Well, I am obligated to stop you-”

“Shut uuuuuuuuup!!!” I interrupt the fairy AGAIN.

“...Okay. I see where this is going, and I don’t want to be here for it.” The fairy flies by me. “Just… Try not to make it painful for her, you know? She’s really so sweet. Or… she used to be… “

And now, it’s just me and the Queen of Winds. She appears before me, speaking random gibberish;

“༄▲🌀༄☽♡☀☽💧☆༄”

Clearly, I don’t understand her language, so I point my sword to the sky, ready for battle.

The Queen of Winds then turns smaller, and the battle begins.

Note: I’m not gonna narrate the battle, because I’m not really good at it. But here’s after the battle!

The Queen of Winds falls to the ground, lightning surrounding her body. She explodes in a field of light, and turns into a lime green crown, similar to Queen Chaos’s crown.

“Two down.” I wipe the sweat off my forehead, relieved from my victory.

“Yeeeeeeah gurl!” Eyala appears before me, proud of my performance. “You da bomb!”

“I know, right?” I respond.

“~♡~”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah girl?” Eyala is confused. I think back again to my first meeting with the dumb bard, to Eyala telling me that we were ending the world, to my first overseer dead, to all that…

“I just don’t get why you never told me we were going to end the world, until that dumb bard was around.”

“It’s comp-”

“Not that it’s bothering me! Heh.” It IS bothering me. A LOT. I just don’t wanna tell her. “I was just curious.”

“It’s complicated. Sorry you found that out in such a lame way. I’m not really supposed to tell the hero that until like, the very end. Cause it’s hard for normies to understand why it’s important.”

“‘Normies’?” I’m very confused right now.

“Y’know, like… mortals?” Eyala tries to explain. “Your planet bein’ doomed is kinda sad… But we’re clearin’ the path for a new. Better universe.”

“Hey! I completely get it. Nothing normie about me! Someone has to stop the spread of the Overseers’ corruption, and kill them before they all become horrible monsters! May as well be me, right?”

“~♡~” Eyala smiles. “That’s why you’re the hero!”

“Yeah girl!”

“Hehe yeah girl!”

“We’re a team, right? So anything you tell that dumb bard, you can tell me too!”

“Noted.” Eyala starts to fade. “Aight, well I’m out. I’ll hit you up later, k? ~♡~” And with that, Eyala disappears, leaving me with the dead overseer.

Note: Okay cool. Intermission narrative done. Back to Kiwi’s POV!

I was sitting in my mom’s bed, feeling pretty bummed, when Eyala showed up to start believing in me again (And to encourage me to keep going) before leaving. I got out of bed, but I still wasn’t my energetic, happy-go-lucky magical girl self. Instead, I was de-transformed, and I felt hopeless and tired. There’s a lore-filled explanation to that.

You see, if I feel positive vibes or sing with a happy heart, my gem will shine with bright colors and generate positive energy, and I am able to transform! But if I only feel negative vibes, my gem will lose its color and generate negative energy, causing me to detransform. My sad singing or fake good vibes won’t make me transform again. The only way to bring my gem’s color back is to do good things for others. But back to the story.

I just wanted to give up and let the world die. But still, I put (what looked like) a smile on my face, and left my mom’s home. As I smiled, my necklace’s gem regained a tenth of its color.

I decided to go talk to Miriam, with nothing better to do, and she told me to sing the Overseer’s song (It’s my mom’s lullaby), but I couldn’t because I wasn’t in my magical girl form, and the factory’s smoke clouds were blocking the nexus point. To fix this, Miriam ordered me to find a way to shut down the factory.

As the not-so energetic human I was, I went to the diner and did basically nothing, until I noticed a strange woman in a lab coat. I decided to talk to her, and she introduced herself as “Elara, the astronomer”. She told me that she loved looking at the stars, but she couldn’t due to the factory’s dumb smoke. So, she told me to find 3 candidates to help her (and me) shut down the factory. Kinda like gathering a magical girl team of some sort. Elara told me that we had to meet at the diner every night.

So, this chapter will focus a LOT on tracking time, considering that there’s a clock at the top of my screen. So I had to sleep for SO many hours to get things done.

As I walked out of the diner, I saw a crying man. I asked him what was wrong, and he explained that he liked this dog, and he always tried to pet it “every night, at 9:30 PM, right in front of the Clocktower Pub”, but every time, the dog refused. Now, at that time, I felt like eating in front of the Clocktower Pub at 9:30 PM, but when I came there, I saw the dog and that man from earlier. He requested I feed the food to the dog. I did, and the dog suddenly loved the man. After naming the dog Queen, I asked the man if he could join my magical girl team, and he agreed. That gave my necklace gem a little more color.

Next, I saw a man playing guitar on a building, but I couldn’t reach him due to bad heights, so I had to parkour over there. Despite being mopey, I managed to make it to the man, and he told me that he had a crush on Miriam. He gave me a love letter, and told me to bring it to Miriam. She stood in front of the factory, from 11:30 AM to 6:30 PM, so more sleep I guess.

Luckily, I made it in time, regaining a bit more color, and gave the letter to Miriam. I could tell she was pissed, and she gave me a responding letter. “And DON’T read it.” I gave it to the man, restoring more color, and he read it.

By now, I had a lot of color restored, and it was almost full. I just needed one more candidate without a job.

I stopped at my mom’s home for a break, and I saw Miriam sitting on my couch. I convinced her to join, she said no, I regained a little more color. So I decided to convince her;

Note: Narrative time! In Kiwi’s POV!!!

“Come on, Miriam!!” I got on my knees and begged.

“What?” Miriam looked at me.

“Why can’t you help us?”

“Why me?”

“Because you’re the only one left!”

“Yeah. Real flattering. Glad to be your last resort.” Miriam looked away. “Y’know, this used to be my adventure. Just me and grandma Saphy. But ever since you showed up, somehow I never get to do anything anymore. Even though I’m the one with the magic powers. How do you think that feels? She probably thinks I’m useless. She trusted me so little she asked you to help me.” She looked back at me. “And then!!! You basically proved her right!!! How do you think THAT feels?”

“I…! Well…” There was a short pause. “I think I know how that feels. Like when I found out that someone else was the hero, It made me so…” My necklace lost a little color. “...pointless. I don’t belong on an adventure.”

“Yeah, except you’re obviously useful!” Miriam reminded me. I looked up. “You sing us through every problem!”

“You’re obviously useful!” I reminded Miriam back. “You can fly and you always know what to do next!” My necklace regained a little more color.

“Somehow, hearing that from you doesn’t make me feel better at all.”

“Me neither.” My necklace regained all its color and started to glow.

Note: No transformation narrating because I didn’t feel like it. Professionals have STANDARDS. Also, the narrative is over.

I transformed back into my magical girl form, which was enough to convince Miriam to join the team.

That night, we met at the diner, discussing our plan. Elara explained that we needed jobs in the factory, and then to “disrupt its basic order” for long enough so I could go to the boss’s office (It’s always ME doing the work), and tell him to shut down the factory.

After getting a job, singing to help the workers dance, and getting in trouble, I ran to the boss’s office and (after a little convincing) bada bing, bada boom, factory is shut down, and I go to one of the HARDEST spirit worlds EVER.

The thing is, you have to use perfectly timed jumps and a LITERAL reversing machine to solve these puzzles, but for SOME reason, my jumps were SO badly timed, and I DIDN’T know how to use the damn reversers correctly, and I kept FALLING, and getting hit by spikes OVER and OVER AGAIN (And at one point, I tried to go through one of the gears, but the top of my head hit the gear and the game CRASHED, never happened again), that I got STUCK on this DAMN SPIRIT WORLD for at least an HOUR. And ZEBRA GAMER over here had the SAME PROBLEMS, only HE made it through quicker than I DID!!! I guess I have what the cool kids these days call a “Skill Issue”.

FINALLY, after SO MANY DAMN HARD PUZZLES, I made it to the Overseer’s castle, where I got stopped by this MOTHERFUCKER called an “Order Fairy”, who STOPPED me! I DIDN’T have an appointment, so we had to BORINGLY SCHEDULE one! AND WITH A DUMBASS SURVEY THAT MAKES ME WANNA-

Q: “What’s the purpose of your visit?”

A: Whatever, personal.

Q: “How big is your party?”

A: Just me.

Q: “How do you take your tea?”

A: I am gonna rip your face off sO HARD-

Q: “Just answer the question.”

A: Fine. Cream and sugar.

And THEN, I had to WAIT!!! (Im)PATIENTLY!!!

FINALLY, after ALL THAT, I made it to Queen Order, who was NOT on her throne, but in FACT, she was CLEARLY pissed at the lazy Dream King. Order wanted to talk to him, but she LITERALLY got KILLED by AUDREY!!! WHYYYYYYYY-

ANYWAY, Miriam got involved, the two got into a big fight, the Dream King revealed some lore before leaving, Audrey left too, and, bada bing, bada boom, I managed to learn the piece of the Earthsong quicker than Zebra Gamer did. Seriously, he took WAY longer than I did.

Note: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

WE’RE ALREADY HALFWAY THROUGH MAGICAL GIRL MAY!?!?!? I gotta complete this game QUICK!!!

To be continued...