Matriarchy

• Matriarchy •

I killed my daughter with rat poison and Granko
on a cold night, in the company of a borrowed cat
pain, blood, vomit, sweat, and even the cat got mixed up in the room
but I don't regret it
for I'm certain I'll never read her version of abandon

if my mother had also killed me
in one of the many times I've asked her with tears in my eyes
as I followed her steps in adoration on the folded rug in the room
maybe she wouldn't regret
the feeling of not having to wax the floor every day

if my grandmother had also killed my mother
instead of leaving her small hands in prayer and her knees on grains of raw rice
maybe my mom wouldn't have written her mom's name on the fresh cement of a tombstone
and I'd might not have killed my daughter
and none of us would have had so many regrets

Bianca Grassi
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